May 20, 2015

I started out the day at a home for sick and dying babies. This place has changed quite a bit since I was there last. Last time I visited, there were multiple. Abides per crib, and so many cribs crammed in each room. It seemed that there were more babies and help, and the babies didn't seem to be getting the help they needed. This time, the home had moved to another building that was bigger, there was enough space around the cribs to get to each baby,and there was one child per crib. The state that some of the children were in was just heartbreaking, but it gave mes feeling of joy and the child a feeling of comfort it seemed, as we just held them, rocked them, and sang to them. I enjoy this so much because although you cannot stay there forever with these babies, you an see for the moment, the difference you are making in these babies life. The first baby that I picked up was a little girl. She was so thin that there was less than no fat on her bones that her skin was wrinkly because their was nothing in there but her bones. The sight of her broke my heart to pieces. She was burning up and had a scarf or some type of fabric wrapped around her arm making me think that her arm was broken. She must of had something in her lungs because she tried to cry and she couldn't. It was one of the saddest things I have seen on this trip. I teamed up as soon as I saw her.

I held many different babies, as one fell asleep, I would lay them in their crib and grab another one to love. I felt that there were more than enough people in there (there was 10 of us there, as well as other volunteers that were either staying there or just there for the day) caring for these adorable babies and I felt that there were kids that were a little bit older not getting as much attention because the sight of these babies are just heartbreaking and some people just don't get past that to visit the other kids. as I walked over there, I was about to go in the door and a mother handed me her baby. I took the baby from her not really knowing what she wanted me to do. I just held her baby for awhile and realized she maybe just needed a little break. I walked around rocking the baby for a while just giving him the same attention as the other kids even though he had someone visiting him. Once the mom seemed like she wanted him k, I handed him to her and she said "thank you".

I walked into a room in a separate building, which held kids that were a little bit older. There was a little girl that would just look up and smile and laugh anytime someone walked by, she may have been sick but her face showed so much happiness. There was also a mother there. She was visiting her daughter. There are no parents allowed in the building, but this parent was an exception because her daughter was so sick. She sat in this hot building with her sick daughter. They spent their time together with the mother doing her daughters hair. It was so cool to see the care this mother had for her sick daughter. As I walked farther back down the row of cribs I saw a little girl that looked so sad, and a little boy sitting in the crib across from her eating his "medical mamba" which is a peanut butter with extra nutrients in it and we was just calm and happy. I went over to the girl first. I saw that she was sitting in the crib soaked in her urine. I walked over to one of the workers and used my best creole to ask for a diaper and new shirt. She handed me one and walked me into this room, patted on a tile counter letting me know that that is where I could change her, and she walked away. I changed this girl and walked outside. I sat on the ground and tried to turn her around so she could see what was going on. As I tried to let her go, she would not let go of my neck. It was like she was holding on so tight to make sure that I wouldn't let her go. Eventually I got her turned around and we sat there for a long period of time. I just loved her and sang to her. I went back into that room to visit that little boy that was sitting across for her. I set the girl down next to me and fed the boy his peanut butter. As he finished I threw it away and picked him up to give him a little bit of love. I held him no more than 5 minutes and a woman knocked on the door. She saw him and each of the, got the biggest smile on their face. I knew right away that she was his mama. I handed him overland she also thanked me for caring for her baby. I felt do much hope in that moment for a couple of reasons,the first is that there are still parents that love and appreciate their babies. So many parents in Haiti have kids due to lack of sex education, and to make child slaves, it is so awesome to see those parents that have their babies and they just love them. The second reason I felt joy was because I felt appreciated and that I was doing good for these parents who are dealing with such a hard thing in life, and I'm sure are also dealing its so much more. 

We spent the afternoon at General hospital. Before we walked in, our translator/driver warned us that it would be warm because the air conditioning was broken. As we walked in we realized just how hot it was. The building was somewhat of a tent. It was a round top building, not made of cement. Because of this, the temperature in there was probably about 120 degrees. We gave out the bags and had to walk out the other side. We brought about 45 care bags filled with toys, stuffed animals, snacks, and personal hygiene products. We brought these bags in and people were so desperate for them. They were following us around begging and grabbing for these things. There were more people than bags, so it was so hard and sad to decide who needed them most and who was not going to get one. We all eventually went back in and tried to visit and pray for the people and children in there but many people were not welcoming to us. I didn't understand until after we left. We walked in there to see what it was like looking at these families as if they were animals in a zoo and they were on display. If we were back in the states and people came to see what was going on in the hospital rooms, it would not fly. I know we went in with good intentions of delivering necessities and sharing prayer, but I definitely understand where else people were coming from. I felt as if I was helpless there. There was nothing more I could do besides giving SOME people bags, and then walking out. I couldn't help these kids because I have absolutely no medical knowledge or supplies. All we could do was pray and leave.